altivo: From a con badge (studious)
[personal profile] altivo
Making progress. I'm not done writing for tonight yet, and the turkey's in the oven still so I have some more time. However, I'm pleased with the way things are shaping up, so here is another excerpt. Francis meets with his mentors, and then meets someone more sinister, in a dream as it seems... or not. This segment should appear before "Old Bones and New" in the final manuscript, and I think you'll see why.

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Words to date: 33.198

Target quota tonight: 41,675

Date: 2009-11-26 04:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mondhasen.livejournal.com
I snuck a peek at this before you posted, on the hunch it would be online by now. It makes more sense of the "Old Bones and New."

I only had trouble with one part, if you're open to such observations:
Francis hurried back to the dorm, thinking about dreams and fantasies, whether they were the same or not. Professor Swift didn't say it had to be an actual sleeping dream. And I have daydreams all the time. Then there's that thing called "lucid dreaming" that I've heard of but I don't think I've experienced. He was still pondering when he reached his room.
Quotations or some sort of phrase attributing the speaking/thought to Francis would have made this passage smoother for me.

Keep it coming :o)

Date: 2009-11-26 05:39 am (UTC)
ext_39907: The Clydesdale Librarian (studious)
From: [identity profile] altivo.livejournal.com
Valid suggestion. This sort of slip is typical of the "write in haste, edit at leisure" approach of the NaNo. I added another 1100 words while waiting for the turkey to be done. Now I get to carve it, make gravy, and go to bed.

As for whether this clarifies anything in the "Old Bones and New" segment, well, I can't really say. Just remember never to assume.

And I'm still on target to finish the 50K goal, possibly as soon as Sunday. XD

Date: 2009-11-26 12:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mondhasen.livejournal.com
I added another 1100 words while waiting for the turkey to be done. Now I get to carve it, make gravy, and go to bed.

mmmm, turkey :o) A wonderful Thanksgiving to you both! ...and anyone else who might stray by.

Date: 2009-11-26 01:50 pm (UTC)
ext_39907: The Clydesdale Librarian (altivo blink)
From: [identity profile] altivo.livejournal.com
Up, watching the neighbors chickens squawking about in the trace of snow and lots of mud. Still have to make a pie.

A good holiday to you as well. Now comes the annual ordeal. We have to pack this stuff up and haul it 60 miles to Chicago. Gary's mom can't do this kind of cooking any more, but she won't come out to us in case one of his brothers should just happen to stop by. Sadly, they never do, I think because each is afraid the other might be there and they've been feuding for two decades now.

Date: 2009-11-26 02:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mondhasen.livejournal.com
Sadly, they never do, I think because each is afraid the other might be there and they've been feuding for two decades now.

My parents had their 62nd wedding anniversary this Sunday. It was difficult for them as my dad resides in a "home" (six months now) and we had to install a ramp in order to bring him into the house.

*banging head on desk* and my sister didn't come because my eldest brother was there. stupid stupid stupid!

hmmmph- her loss, not ours.

Date: 2009-11-26 03:34 pm (UTC)
ext_39907: The Clydesdale Librarian (wet altivo)
From: [identity profile] altivo.livejournal.com
Families. We wouldn't be here without them, and yet they cause more problems than they solve. My grandfather and great uncle had a fight at my high school graduation party and never spoke to each other again for the rest of their lives as far as I know. My father's family was full of those kind of stories, like his father refusing to speak to or acknowledge his aunt when she visited for three days while he was young.

I admit it. In general I have a very low opinion of humanity.

Date: 2009-11-26 06:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hellmutt.livejournal.com
Ooooh, chilling. And the first hint of the supernatural we've seen. Like it a lot!

Date: 2009-11-26 11:40 pm (UTC)
ext_39907: The Clydesdale Librarian (studious)
From: [identity profile] altivo.livejournal.com
Well, Hammel is a skeptic as you'll see eventually. So am I. So you'll only see hints, I'm afraid.

Far too much blood though, darn it.

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